by the by...

well, i've been running amok recently and have neglected my blog... my apologies.


school has begun and looks as though it will be an interesting and busy semester to say the least. only taking three classes this time around: Foundations of Policy, Human Behaviors in Diverse Populations and Research and Evaluation Methods I. though, i already think that one of my professors and i are not going to get along rather well.


there is one item of business i would like to share. i had an "a-ha" moment this weekend. [this will probably sound unhealthily self-deprecating here towards the beginning but keep with me; and, as i am typically a bit more colorful, i'll try to put this in language that won't make you think that i absolutely hate myself.]


i despise the way my body looks because of my weight. while this fact has not kept me from dating, or hanging out with friends or my non-dating confidence per se... it is beginning to weigh on my conscience (pun intended) more and more and more. i don't like it. and this may be more information than you care to know, but i don't even like it when i take off my shirt. this weekend, i was at a movie with some of my friends. i won't tell you which movie it is, because i'm completely disturbed by the fact that i actually went and saw this movie. let's just say the plot involved a typical Hollywood-movie romance. i'm fairly strong-minded and strong-emotioned about romance movies and this one was horrifically worse than i have ever seen.


but, it sparked within my mind [and it may have to do with being broken up with recently] something that truly pissed me off about my life: i don't care about a lot of stuff. well, let me be more specific... i don't care enough about a lot of stuff to do anything about it. id est, my looks, taking care of myself, being a healthy sleeper


well, that realization was all i really needed i guess. i made some immediate changes which i won't burden you with. they mostly have to do with physical, mental and spiritual health.


i don't know if i'll keep doing the changes everyday, but i want to end up with the changed being the norm rather than the exception.


so there we have it. an a-ha moment that led to immediate change... let's hope the change turns into permanent. or at least, into good habit.


and for good measure, a snippet of a conversation i had last summer with a stranger:
Me: How are you today, sir?
Elderly Man: [God] woke me up this morning, I'm doing great! Now, I've got a lot of shit to do and I won't get all of it done. But I got to wake up this morning, so I'm doing fine.


 
 
 
 
 
 
ssdd,
levi

a few quotes

the following two quotes i ran across in recent months and they both seem appropriate to my life. for reasons i'm not completely sure of just yet...

"This quest, this need to solve life's mysteries... in the end, what does it matter when the human heart can only find meaning in the smallest of moments?"

"There's two kinds of people in this world when you boil it all down. You've got your talkers and you've got your doers. Most people are just talkers. All they got is talk. But when all is said and done, it's the doers who change the world. And when they do that, they change us. And that's why we never forget them. So, which one are you? Do you just talk about it or do you stand up and do something about it? Because believe you me, all the rest of it is just coffeehouse bullshit."

the first is from the TV series Heroes and the second is from the movie Boondock Saints II.




school starts next week! i'll be glad to have something to do again...



ssdd,
levi


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things learned in 2010

about 6 years ago i made a New Year's resolution of "no more New Year's resolutions" and i've kept it ever since. soooo, since i don't do resolutions, i'm doing a post about what i learned or re-learned in the year 2010: happy, sad, difficult and everything in between.

and some of these may seem rather simple... actually most of them probably will, but that's the joy of life... sometimes the simplest lessons are the hardest to integrate.

in 2010, i learned that...

1. i am (extraordinarily) introverted, but being around other people keeps me grounded and my head out of the clouds

2. i miss seeing my family a lot

3. no job or person is so important that you should sacrifice yourself so much that you lose who you are and what you believe in

4. i'm just as and no more important as anyone else... so i need to take care of myself but not think that i deserve something any more than anyone else

5. my life is rather unbalanced

6. people will lie to you and lie and lie and lie

7. my dogs love me like nobody's business... and that this helps me get through a lot of stuff

8. something that's important or difficult for you may be really simple for someone else, that this can cause a lot of frustration and that it's ok that it causes frustration

9. having a friend who will tell you "no" when everybody else is too chicken enough to tell you "no" is fantastic

10. turning the daily humdrum of life into something fantastic is much easier with people you love than trying to do it by yourself

and 11th one for good luck:

11. life is better outside J




ssdd,
levi